Where the bloody hell are you?

...pink and purple are so the new flouro green and flouro pink. I've been at this banner for about 3 hours now and I've officially given up. So suffer the fantastically headache inducing pink and purple. Sheesh I sure am white in that left picture, I can almost see my pancreas.To the people who wanted to see Ron choc drops - I do apologise, I mean I don't want to offend anyone who isn't a nipple lover. You know people get offended by anything these days. Even by that bloody Australia tourism ad. Yeah you know, you've seen it... the one I have embedded below.

You know I've been thinking about it and if people are offended by that *gasp* profanity, us Aussies have plenty of phrases we could replace it with. - but you must sound like Alf Stewart to make them work. I'm pretty sure something like "Strewth!, where the friggen 'eck are yah bruisers?" or "Get down to the beach yah flamin' galahs/mungrels" would do the trick. Also, how unrealistic is the ad?... They didn't even show one gronk.


Gronkness as demonstrated by the fabulous Merrick & Rosso

Seems that someone was already on to it... This follow up ad appeared on some TV show. I think this will generate more visitors than any ad campaign could have. But beware - this ad has what I would consider a real swear word.






In all seriousness though, the proper ad shows a beautiful side of our country. Although I think there were one too many stereotypes thrown in there - I was waiting for Steve Irwin to make a cameo. So what the friggen 'eck are you waiting for?... Are yah bruisers gonna come visit me or wat???...

The return of the yaya

Over the weekend Ron & I celebrated Prive's b'day in true dress up style.

Me, Dalvin & Ron // Me and a random gorilla last halloween

Ron totally looked hotter than I did because his outfit was from Bras 'n' Things and mine was from cheap and nasty store in America. His was backless and more frilly too. Ron also had a better cleavage than I did. haha.

Every dress up party i go it seems that there is someone dressed like a gorilla. This time it was Dalvin and at least he wasn't trying to bite my boob like the other gorilla. Those two pictures also serve as my before and after kickboxing fat photos haha. So compliment me away. a hoy hoy!


I'll be your eyes: When a stranger callsDon't worry no kids were harmed during this remake... But let me summarise this 86 minute cliche fest with 15 lessons I learnt from watching it.

1. It is completely legal to have carnivals on the vacant lot next to your house.
2. A serial killer can shred a girl to pieces with his bare hands but later cannot dispose of a lanky 16 year old girl.
3. The blonde is always an alcoholic, self confessed bitch and will always die first.
4. The sweet girls boyfriend is always a jock.
5. A minority will always portray the other nice best friend.
6. The housekeeper is always Mexican.
7. There is always a bathroom scene.
8. Getting a large clump of your hair yanked out of your head won't hurt one bit.
9. A cat is scarier than a serial killer.
10. A shiny new car will always have mechanical failure when someone is chasing you.
11. To get through to the police you dial '0' instead of '911'.
12. Apparently Cluedo is not the only place where someone thinks they can kill with a candlestick.
13. A serial killer doesn't carry a weapon but he will always carry his cell phone.
14. Cats really do eat birds.
15. It's not upsetting seeing one of your best friends dead (even if they did kiss your boyfriend).

what do you mean you can see my eyebrows through the phone // dieeeeeeeeeeeeeeee muthaaaaaa fuckkkkkerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

I'll leave you with my favourite quote from the movie - which went something like this...

Officer Burroughs: He is hand cuffed, ankle cuffed and has enough tranquilisers to knock out 4 horses.
Jill Johnson: Thats not enough.

wow. now read it again but remember the poor delivery, emotionless faces and the over dramatised voices. This movie could have been over in 10 minutes if Jill quit answering the phone and locked herself with the kids in their room. Boom. How did the movie end? I have absolutely no idea. Was it all a dream? Or did she land in the loony bin because of what happened? The main thing is that the film ended. Lets give credit where it is due though because this film had the best damn location scout ever. The house that this film was shot in was absolutely DIVINE.

And finally, only watch it if:
1. You want to stare at someone cute for 80 minutes
2. You want some architecture/interior decorating tips
3. You want to feel better about your own acting skills
4. You don't know what a cliche is

Don't watch it if:
1. You hate cats
2. You want to see another blonde die
3. Your favourite movie is Saw

Sorry, just had to get that out of my system. Now I can sleep. haha.

This is your life

During the flights I have taken to and from Philippines I have met alot of interesting people. What is it with these people that makes them want to tell me their entire life story? Actually, my problem is that I am too nice to ignore them. haha. I am always careful never to tell any random person anything more personal than my name. I would never tell strangers personal things about my family, boyfriend, friends, etc... I just find these conversations weird and totally uncomfortable. So for 8 hours I am stuck with these random people and by the end of the flight I basically know what they have done in the past 10 years of their life (and what they plan on doing for the next 10 years). The only thing they know about me is that I was that girl seated in 36K.

The first time I flew on a plane by myself was in 2000 when I met up with my family for a cousins wedding. I was still under 18 at the time so my dad organised for one of the flight crew to 'check up' on me throughout the flight. I was informed that I would be sitting next to 'a lovely lady from New Zealand'. Lovely she was. So was her bloody life story. Starting from the part when she left the Philippines about 30 years ago. I listened to her struggles and triumphs of how she finally built a life for herself in NZ. At the time I was going on 18 years old and she was making life sound so... ummm... well... boring.

On the same flight there were two Titas sitting behind me on either side of the aisle. When Tita New Zealand took a break, the two behind me would go on about why it was so important to have a Filipino boyfriend and why I should learn how to speak Tagalog. Ha!

I was the first bloody person off that plane. That is just incident number one; there are at least 100 more. Anyway, glad to have had my sister travelling with me this last time and glad to have finally met the kind & cute steward who I have seen the past 4 times I have flown to Phils... He gave us 2 bottles of wine *giggle*. This time wine, maybe next time he will upgrade us to business class. ;) ha!

The Impromptu Holiday

Theres nothing like a quick trip overseas and theres nothing like a few snaps in honour of it.

me, lisa & ate che // here you go crisa. haha



yes. we really are first cousins



the rats of the road