How to survive a bear attack.

This is serious business. Why was I not told this? I don't know if I've mentioned this before buuuuut... My first year at camp I took one of my girls to the infirmary and on the way back to our cabin in the pitch dark I heard a rustling in the bushes (yes I know how cliche) and saw in the shadows a massive beast!!! I grabbed my whistle out of my pocket, shoved the girl behind me and started furiously blowing my whistle. I scared off that beast alright. That huge, monstrous deer. Bastard. My girl rolled her eyes and did the whole omg Belle, you are so embarassing thing - kinda like what I do when my mum gets out naked baby pictures of me and shows them to her friends. Whatever, I saved that girls life!!!